Friday, June 28, 2013

Mealtimes

I come from a family where all four of us were almost always at war, but mealtimes were sacred. We all ate together and it was not unusual to find us sitting and chatting at the table long after the meal was over. We talked about a lot of things, not necessarily private, and the conversations were always interesting.

Vicky comes from a family where they all ate when it suited them and often people picked up their plates and walked off into their rooms to eat. It was more about convenience than conversation.

In our household after many fraught mealtimes we have reached an understanding of sorts. We have lunch together, mostly, but we don't talk. Sometimes Rahul and I talk, but mostly we all finish our food and leave.

7 comments:

Cee Kay said...

That's sad, the arrangement you have come to. For me too, the more important part of the meals is chatting, not the eating.

Sue said...

Cee -- I feel the difference when my parents come to visit because then there is conversation around my table too.

Anonymous said...

I've made sit down dinner, no electronics and pleasant conversation a rule at our home for a month now. It was all getting to me. Peez picking up their plates and parking in front of the TV, no mention made of the lovely food I'd just slaved to make, just grunts and uhs while they ate(this in a household of just three humans mind you. The dog gives me slavish devotion when I feed her). So I yelled "cut!". We struggled at first with the conversation part and some were rude enough to finish quickly and want to get up and leave but then my 9 year old broke the impasse with his fart jokes(henceforth banned in favor of more food friendly topics) and we were on to a good thing then on:-)

Deepa

dipali said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
dipali said...

When my kids were younger, my mom, when she stayed with them, would encourage them to do one thing at a time-i.e. eat and not talk.While I don't advocate talking with your motuth full, I certainly advocate talking at mealtimes.It's a lovely way to bond, mostly, if no one gets mad and walks off in a huff. Last few years of her life I think my mother learned to appreciate and enjoy our lunch time conversations.One of the nicer things that happened in my aunt's house was the family bowing their heads in prayer before they started eating. Somehow I've never managed to sustain that practice.

Thinking Cramps said...

That's a pity. As kids we had to take special permission if we wanted the TV on during mealtimes. Now, with just me and Anando, it's not easy to enforce that rule and we often eat in front of the TV. But on week-nights I insist on meals at the table and conversation as well. The day feels incomplete without.

Sue said...

Deepa -- Sounds good to me, fart jokes notwithstanding!

Dipali -- Prayer has finally begun to take on meaning for me. Last week, when S' mother was missing in Uttarakhand, I prayed.

Ana -- I accepted defeat a long time ago. I cannot force conversation on a person. Rahul however likes to chat, so let's see how mealtimes are when he's older.