Tumi kaalke amar schooler bondhu ke lathi diya merechhile.
(You're bad. Yesterday you hit my schoolfriend with a stick.)
Favoured visitors and startled grandparents are regularly informed that I'm a bad mother and beat him up. The ways in which I do this are highly inventive. Apparently I slap him awake every morning and sometimes I just come out of the blue and smack him silly and yet other times I scare him so much he doesn't ever want to live with me.
You would have to be looking into his face to see the unrepentent twinkle in his eyes and only then might you realise that he is lying his little ass off. Sometimes, even then you have your doubts. Why, after all, would a child say such things about his mother of all people?
Because, and I cannot stress this too highly, not everybody is Rahul Niyogy. He doesn't do the things you might expect him to do (or not do).
Speaking for myself, I am highly relieved we do not live in countries where children are apparently taken away from their parents on suspicion of beatings.