Friday, September 05, 2008

Too Much Too Soon

He'll be two in twenty days and I'm watching my baby slip away from me. Every day there is something that he does that is so 'grown up' that I want to kick him out of the house and go bawl in the bathroom.

Yesterday morning he 'brushed' his teeth all on his own while V and I footled around with our own. OK, he brushed more tongue than teeth, but he did it on his own.

The other day I absentmindedly asked him to bring me some water and he went to the dining-table, climbed up on a chair, brought the 2l bottle of water down and carefully carried it to me.

He's still throwing tantrums but they are getting a shade more manageable. And sometimes they can be deflected by sending him off to send his "Aati" (plastic elephant) off to sleep. Once I thoughtlessly asked him to give "Aati" a bath as a change, and I found him marching off to the bathroom!

He still talks mainly in Babble but when he wears his little tailored shirts he looks like a little boy. Not my baby. He's growing up and reaching out to the world, learning new things every day. To him it's a wonderful world (barring the occasional parental frustration of his cherished aims). He wakes up with a wide grin, sure of his welcome. He walks into my arms when I'm angry with him, knowing he's still my own son. Baby, that's never changing, no matter how badly you and I fight.

Vicky is teaching him to apologise when I'm upset. He takes R to a quiet corner and explains to him that he must say sorry. Then the little boy comes over and tentatively smiles and reaches out.

I take him out with me, now and then, when I run my errands. He enjoys his trips to the Post Office. He's so good at making friends, somehow. He's the kind of child you find yourself playing with at public places. The other day he walked all the way from our place to the Post Office -- a long walk for 23 month old legs -- and then spent the ten minutes we were there chatting up whoever would talk to him. Which basically meant the whole room full of folks his grandparents age.

Spent all day yesterday sans diapers, until he went out yesterday. I will never again criticise parents for making their kids pee on the sides of the road. No, it's not a pretty sight but there's really nothing else for it. When V and I are on the ball he doesn't need diapers at home or for quick trips to the nearby shops.

He enjoys travelling and doesn't care how he does it. He loves going to new places and meeting new people. He wants his plateful of rice to fill him up but in between he's willing to taste all kinds of foods. He is showing a love of hot stuff, with chillies galore. Likes curd straight but not cooked, thank you. Loves chilli chicken. He is taking an interest in his clothes and has always taken an interest in mine, in how I do my hair. Now he shows me the vest/shirt I've laid out and hands it to me when he thinks that it's time he got ready.

When he's ready to leave, when he considers a visit has gone on long enough he hands me his sandals. Which he has outgrown. I have to bring out new clothes and shoes for him once more. The vest bought for him in July is now hanging above his navel.

He loves dancing and has some weird steps that Vicky insists on copying. The friendship between him and his father is something I watch and learn from. They fight and yell and hit each each other and they show each other an adoration I don't think they show me, dammit. When V and I fought V would retreat from us both, but of late he retreats only from me. R is now old enough to have an entirely separate relationship with his father. V tells me on the phone from work to put a particular stool out in the balcony so that his Bhabs can watch the world go by.

The sheer mischief in Rahul's look makes think. It's dancing in his eyes, coursing through his fidgety wee body, coming out in his grins. He sure doesn't get it from me.

And now he's here, climbing into my arms, refusing to be denied. Sticking one finger on his nose and looking at what I'm doing. I'm not sure whether I'm holding my baby or a little boy. Either way, he's all the sunshine in the world to me.

32 comments:

phoenixritu said...

A truly heartfelt post. Made me smile and cry a bit all together.

First Rain said...

Oooh that's just lovely!

D said...

Such a bitter-sweet post! :)

Rohini said...

Beautifully written, Sue. While I do feel bits of nostalgia for the baby he was, I am starting to really fall in love with the boy he's become/ becoming and wouldn't turn back time for the world!!!

themunchkinblog said...

Crap! I'm all teary eyed now..don;t even want to think of the Munchkin growing up..

Mama - Mia said...

this was SUCH a beautiful post! such raw and loving emotions! rahul is one lucky dude! :)

and because i love reading your blog lots, can you pls pick up an award from my blog?!

cheers!

abha

Parul said...

:-)

:-(

Kodi's Mom said...

almost 2 already! yes this baby or boy dilemma continues for a while longr, it is such a sweet transition.

brundha said...

This is such a lovely post. It makes me long to have a baby of my own.

DotThoughts said...

Beautiful post! You touched a nerve here. Your pride and joy at having him shines through every word!

umarah said...

oh the first three lines say all about i feel about my 8 months old.she is trying to walk etc and i feel like crying:)

Tharini said...

Beautiful words Sue. Gosh I loved the sweetness of this little baby-boy that shone through his Mamma's love. I love the kind of relationship you share with him. It seems soo....'equal'...if you know what I mean. Like you are both good chums.

dipali said...

Aww Sue! His Bhabletness is just adorable:)

saptarshi said...

This is such a lovely post! :) Haven't seen Bhablet in a long time.

Thinking Cramps said...

I loved this. I meant to comment on the earlier picture of him in the kurta at your friend's wedding - he looked like a little boy, not the baby I had in my mind!

eve's lungs said...

He's the handsomest young man I know, Sue. About his growing up, now you know how I feel at having Srin flying off from the nest? So cuddle him and pet him while you can.

mayG - /meɪ̯ - ʤi/ said...

aww.. such heartfelt words sue, you almost made me cry :)

dipali said...

Something for you on my blog, Sue.

Itchingtowrite said...

oh this is so sweet

Sue said...

Ritu, D -- :)

First Rain -- What is? That I'm losing my baby? :(

Ro -- I know, I know, but I'm not ready!

Avanti -- Well, you got some more time. Make the most of it.

Abha -- Thank you!

Parul -- Yes, that about sums it up.

Kodi's Mom -- Yes, where did the months fly?

Brundha -- :) You will. And you'll be a good mother.

Dot -- Not the impatience and the frustration?

Umarah -- Awww... I didn't know you had one in the house as well!

Tara -- We are, I think, you know. We've always been very equal, me being a little more equal than him, if you know what I mean. ;)

Dipali -- I know! And he won't be a a Bhablet much longer. I just cannot decide whether that's a good thing or a bad.

Sue said...

Saptarshi -- Drop by, or are you waiting for an engraved invitation now?

Ana -- Yes. :(

Evie -- I do, oh I do. When the child allows it.

MayG -- I almost made myself cry. :) What can I say, I'm easily influenced!

Dipali -- Thank you!

Itchy -- :) Tell me, is it easier when it's twins? Are you relieved that they grow up?

Monika,Ansh said...

aww....such a sweet post Sue. & you'll never be ready for the many stages that r yet to come. My son is 4 & I still feel this tugging of the cord between us........like it is too small for him now.

Y said...

I need to meet you and your Bhablet and soon...Love!

Mona said...

aw, sue. a beautiful post indeed. hugs!

Subhashree said...

Aww... Sue. Such a beautiful post. The Bhablet has grown up indeed.

Casuarina said...

Well, I'm thinking you're damn lucky to have a libran son...you'll always mean the world to him...:-)

mummyjaan said...

Wow, 2 already? Doesn't take long for them to get from 1 to 2, from 2 to 3...and so on. Enjoy every moment, Sue :)

Maggie said...

Sweetness :-)

choxbox said...

wasnt he turning 1 just the other day?!!

Sue said...

Monika -- :( No hope, you tell me?

Y -- The eagerness is mutual, I assure you. And V assures me he has no plans Delhiwards. Bother.

Mona -- Well, you know just what I'm talking about!

Subha -- Yes. Why? How come I looked forward to this?

Casuarina -- Really? None of the Librans I know are Mamma's boys. Oh well, it's a nice thought.

Mummyjaan -- I tell you, most moments I'm hovering around homicide. And these other moments in between throw me off kilter. Bah.

Maggie -- Yes...

Chox -- Yes, he was. :(

Neera said...

Such a beautiful heart warming post. Rahul really does have a wonderful personality and I can see why from the way you treat him like an 'equal' as tara says. Loved the idea of sending off Aati to bed when he gets upset. Shall try it out myself.

Sue said...

Neera -- Nah, he was born with an over-bearing personality. One of the few pros of being half Roy. :)