Friday, May 19, 2006

Screwy Thoughts

I've been meaning to blog about this for a few days but keep forgetting to.

There's massive renovation happening all over our office, especially in our old room. That's where the Ladies' is, so I wasn't particularly surprised to find a screw lying inside the commode, at the bottom. As predicted, it rusted nicely orange over the next few days.

When I went to, uh, powder my nose, this Monday, I saw a pin lying there. You know, the long, thin variety. What I daresay a screw can be melted down into.

Which raises the question: How scary are the corroding powers of, uh, human waste?

(Don't even waste your time surmising what if somebody'd fished up the screw and then a pin had fallen in later -- who'd fish it up in the first place and why?)

Perhaps I do think too much. But, it wasn't V who said it first. My mother beat him to it nearly two decades earlier, and she sounded a great deal more exasperated than he ever does. What she actually yelled was, Eto bhabchhilish keno? ("Why were you thinking so much?")

Speaking of mothers, she's in town.

Speaking of screwy matters, I wonder if this will be my first post to be flagged as 'Objectionable Content'? Ye gods and little fishes!

19 comments:

Grafxgurl said...

i think the screw got flushed down.. and a pin dropped in from somewhere else later on.

YES! NAILS and SCREWS are gonna get you into the adult blog section!!

*giggle*

im DYING for some Calcutta puchka!!!

Sue said...

Grafx - I've been forbidden any phuchka till the kid's born, cos of potential tummy probs. Dunno how long I'll hold out, but sympathise with my current agony. V looks murderous if I so much as mention the p word.

Oh, and try flushing a screw. They just do't go away. Like lead bullets, but that's another story and censored at that...

Chilla-Bong said...

Interesting...The saga of A Nail that was born to be Screwed but got Pinned instead.Gurl,you really got an eye for details.

Now keep a watch at your stats-counter.Pretty soon all the misdirected PINNED-n-SCREWED googlers around the globe will be frequenting this blog.

Sue said...

Chill - Lol. That aspect hadn't struck me. You think I should get one of those tracking counters, then?

Grafxgurl said...

eeks!! now she talks about bullets!! BABE! youre DANGEROUS!!

ah my gad!! i dont know HOW you manage without all that yummy indian "junk" food!!!

i really do feel sorry for ya..

ROFLMAO @ "Flushing a Screw".ohhhhhhhh no comment!!

Strictly for my friends said...

Incidentally, something which escaped your notice.... there were a couple of days before the screw converted into a pin! And during the interval, there was...nothing!! Go figure!

Sue said...

Purbita - I hadn't noticed. But you comfort me muchly.

M (tread softly upon) said...

well I have to agree with grafx here that the screw got flushed and a pin fell in. That has to be the only explanation!

the wannabe indian punkster said...

When I went to, uh, powder my nose

ha ha ha...:D

* runs away hastily*

:P

soumyak kanti said...

beshi jol tol na khele ei hoy.
screw theke pin hoye jaye.

Sue said...

M - Like I said, try flushing a screw. The darn thing's usually too heavy. But yes, if it got corroded smaller, why not? Which brings us back to the question of corrosive powers. Eek.

Megha - Lol... My mother did try to bring me up to be a lady.

Kanti - Baba always said I was such a twisted person that if I ate a pin I'd shit a screw. Go figure.

Cyberswami said...

its like that joke where this aristocrat called Nutts finds that his son has run away, leaving his laundry-maid impregnated. The press are about to have a field day with the scandal but Nutts using his authority manages to get them to tone down the story. He can't, however, stop the headline: Nutts Screws Washers and Bolts.

Then again, it isn't like that at all.

Sue said...

Cyberswami - It's little bit like that, except what I really have in mind is that censored story of the little lead air rifle bullet...

Cyberswami said...

haven't heard it methinks.

i'm intrigued!

Sue said...

Cyberswami - :-D It's censored, all the same.

Cyberswami said...

oh come on!

perhaps some Anonymous Commenter will step up and fill the breach?

(hint hint wink wink)

Sue said...

Cyberswami - 'Fraid not. Only people to know the story are me and my immediate family, and as far as I know, they don't frequent this blog. My dad would tell you like a shot, he loves it.

Cyberswami said...

i meant you, but oh well.

little lead air rifle bullet will remain lodged where it is...

and i take it you didn't intend the 'like a shot' play on words?

ooo the plot thickens!

Sue said...

Cyberswami - I didn't miss any of that. 'Nuff said?

Just to give you an easier sleep tonight, the bullet isn't lodged anywhere that I know of. Never was, so far as I know, unless you're using 'lodged' in the sense of 'resided'?